Bath Time With... is a new series from 39BC. We visit the bathrooms of our muses and friends — and find that a private space has a way of unlocking a uniquely intimate conversation about routines, rituals, and the objects they can't live without.

This week: Editor and Brand-Builder, Alice Casely-Hayford

I am not a water baby.

One of my very first memories of water has been influenced by quite an iconic picture of me aged three in a swimming pool. I am screaming, livid, desperately unhappy to be in the pool.

So I think it was kind of engrained in me that I’m not a water baby, because in those first swimming lessons, I was just having none of it. I won’t pretend I feel at one with the sea, or that I’m an avid swimmer. I was fleetingly on the water polo team at school, but I think that’s just because I was a tall, Black, reasonably athletic-looking woman, so they put me on the team — and then quickly I was booted off.

I’m not a water baby, but I love a bath. I do have early memories of being in the bath with my brother. And now it’s a central part of my day, every single day.

Growing up, bathing wasn’t just functional in our house — it was aesthetic.

We didn’t have a shower, only a bath, and it was beautiful. Freestanding, with stained glass windows filtering the light. My parents had created this sanctuary. They loved the idea of bathing, so it is something I really saw. I loved watching my mum putting on her makeup. Our bathroom was a really exquisite place in our family home. So yes, I think of my family as bathers, and the bathroom as an important beating heart of the household.

The smell was always the same.

Potpourri. Santa Maria Novella. My mum has been the most die-hard fan for as long as I can remember. We’d always have potpourri dotted around the bathroom and lots of candles.

It was full of strong, beautiful smells that were really evocative. When I smell them now, going into my mum’s home, it takes me back to my childhood immediately. Her bathroom now is still gorgeous. She loves Acqua di Parma and Santa Maria Novella, so it was a beautiful, almost pharmacy, powdery kind of smell, maybe with a religious-connotation.

In my twenties, I had absolutely no time for any of this

Bathing was purely practical. In, out, done. Sometimes it was about washing away a hangover, sometimes just about getting clean before the next work day. There was no ritual, no romance, no lingering. I didn’t need it — or maybe I didn’t know I did.

Now, it’s the opposite. I definitely luxuriate.

It was funny, because I was in the bath earlier before this interview thinking, what am I going to talk about? And I realised I have my eureka moments in the bath. It’s the one time I have proper peace.

The only other time I’m really by myself is in Pilates, but I’m so focused on the exercise that I’m not thinking about bigger-picture things. Whereas in the bath — even though I’m not the type of person who’s going to be in there for half an hour with a glass of wine and candles — it’s still the one time when I’m truly thinking blue sky. The deeper, meaningful stuff.

We, too, have created a bit of a sanctuary in our bathroom, although it’s funny because our kids’ toys are scattered all over the bath. I love that it’s my quiet time.

I bathe every day.

For me, it’s quite a short ritual. I’ll run the bath, I might light a candle. I will certainly use — well, I’m obsessed with the Fig Milk oil. It is exquisite.

I bathe every day. Sunday is usually the only day I’ll have a shower, and that’s when I do a full hair wash — I only wash my hair once a week. Although, today I did it because I recently left my office job and had the time.

If I’ve exercised, I might rinse off quickly before the bath so I’m going in relatively clean. Otherwise, it’s very simple. I just use my hands, sometimes a flannel. Occasionally I’ll use an exfoliating brush or mitt, but it’s all quite efficient.

Everything in my life needs to be efficient.

That’s why I love something like Fig Milk

It’s so sensual and the smell is beautiful. You don’t really need to use very much. It just feels like a treat, but it’s relatively straightforward — which everything in my life needs to be. It works so well, and quickly, and beautifully. It’s not like having to use 10,000 products. I love it.

I also love how the 39BC bottle looks in the bathroom. We have these blue, Moroccan-style tiles around our bath, and it just sits there so beautifully — even next to my kids’ very un-beautiful products.

I gave birth in the water

But not exactly as planned. With Arthur, who is our four, almost five-year-old, I wanted to give birth in water, but at the last minute, literally as he was coming out, I was in agony and decided I didn’t want to. So I jumped out of the birth pool, much to their annoyance, and scrambled onto the bed. I gave birth to him quite soon after.

Then with Alfie, who’s almost two, I gave birth in the pool. It was the most incredible experience. It was just the perfect labour and welcome into the world.

My baby came out in his sac

Which is hopefully good luck. He was just bobbing in the water, and then we scooped him out. As he came out, he sort of erupted from the sac. Sorry, that’s quite graphic, but it was the most magical, amazing experience.

I’d gone to the hospital 12 hours earlier and they sent me away because I was only one centimetre dilated, even though I was convinced I was about to have him.

So I went home and spent the whole day in the bath. My husband Sean was holding my hand and singing me songs. It was really magical, albeit painful.

Then finally I waddled back into the hospital 12 hours later and they couldn’t run the pool fast enough because they were like, this baby is coming now! As the pool reached the depth where I could get in, he was halfway out. It all happened very quickly.

For both my boys, I spent the whole day in the bath before they were born. With Arthur my mum was with me mostly. So yes, that bath has seen it all.

And now every day without fail, I do not miss bath time with the children.

Even if I have an event in the evening or I’m going for dinner with friends, I will only ever go after bath time. Just before the bath, my kids are at their craziest because they’re hyped up after childcare and school.

So we militantly head up for bath time at 6.15 every day. We slowly play upstairs in the bedroom for a little bit while we’re running the bath. Then they both get in and spend quite a long while in there.

Our boys have their own separate toys at either end of the bath, so they’re not actually interacting that much with each other, although it’s starting to happen. They splash around. Sometimes we play music. It’s just the happiest part of the day.

There’s something about water that resets them. Resets all of us, actually. We talk about their day, about what’s happening tomorrow. It becomes a small, contained world — like the one I remember from my childhood.

Afterwards, they come out wrapped in towels. Alfie still has one with ears and a little tail, so he’s like the cutest koala bear ever. Arthur can go into his room and entertain himself for a little bit while we get Alfie ready, cream him and read him a story. Sometimes, if we’re lucky, Arthur might read one with him.

Alfie’s bedtime routine takes a lot longer, so we put him down first. They’re both wrapped up in their little towels. Arthur is really into slippers now, so he gets into his slippers.

There’s nothing better than pulling a clean baby out of the bath, wrapping them in a towel, and snuggling them. And then it’s over. Bedtime. My evening begins

I’m from lots of different places, but Ghana is the place I feel the strongest connection to.

My mum is from the Caribbean — from St Kitts and Sint Eustatius — and my dad is from Ghana and Sierra Leone.

The thing that is front of mind for me, particularly from both my grandmothers, is looking after your skin.

My white husband can jump in and out of the shower and just step straight into his clothes, and that is it. I’ve had to teach him a lot about how to look after our babies’ skin — I was like, you better cream these boys up.

It’s about using beautiful soaps, exfoliating well — particularly from my West African grandmother — and then all of the magical creams. Especially for hair, but certainly for the body and skin. I remember so vividly her creaming herself and teaching that to me and my cousins.

To be honest, being an 80s/90s baby, I remember hair shop cocoa butter and those things on the shelf, but I wouldn’t dream of using that now. I have all sorts of ridiculously expensive, luxurious creams that I use now.

For my hair, I’ll use Charlotte Mensah Manketti oil and lots of different natural oils that feel important to me and my heritage.

I’m really excited to be stepping into a new chapter.

One of my proudest achievements over the past five years was launching and evolving a podcast, so I’m really passionate about podcasting. Watch this space!

Throughout my career, I’ve been a storyteller, editor and marketer within fashion, and I’m excited about moving into a slightly different area and exploring opportunities there.

But for the moment, I’m here.

Summer is starting. The days are brighter. I wake up and, for once, there’s no fixed place I have to be. It’s unfamiliar, slightly uncomfortable — and completely exhilarating.

And every evening, at 6:15pm, I run the bath.

Photos: Suzannah Pettigrew